1:38PM
It’s June!! I’m so excited for all it has to offer me–I can tell already that it’s going to be insane. I can’t wait to see what manifestations this month brings me. I can already see that I’m still being spoken to.
One manifestation I need to continue to declare is keeping up with the long-term grind. I need to remember that as much as life right now is a grand ol’ time, there is so much more out there for me.
Yesterday was VegFest (where I was vending for [redacted] with [redacted]) and it was a wondrous time. It was a great start to the month. I loved interacting with and watching people. Detroit has an immaculate amount of people with solid steez, and being among their energy definitely fed me. Here’s one of the most beautiful parts–our sales ended up being $601. 601 is also 6/01 (June first). I felt as though the universe was reminding me that it still has me, even though it’s a new month.
I’m definitely still having way too much fun. I won’t stop that energy, as it’s how I’m giving myself grace, but I definitely need to factor in responsibilities, the grind, and keeping a hold on life.
At this time I’m also recognizing that my month of taking and soaking as much of life as I can was preparation to overflow. It’s not the highest priority–as I know I must put myself first–but I do see how I can be there in a strong way for those around me that I care about.
I’ve recognized how grand and beautiful life was, is, and always will be. Ugh, like wow–I’m laughing so hard and so much these days, and I will not allow that to stop. To be honest, so much of right now are things I refuse to let go of. This energy, zeal, and admiration of life as its own entity is spectacular. As much as there’s so much I need to do to be healthier and a better person, I think that holding onto this time as valuable is okay. I truly believe I was being constrained (once again).
I know I’m still in the same cycle of reacting in extremes, but I believe (at least for now) that that’s okay and something I need. I love love love and adore how much life is picking me up and showing me its grandeur.
I feel like a lot of my entries are ridiculously repetitive, but I definitely have already seen how much journaling does for me. It’s speaking so much into existence and helping me appreciate, breathe in, and bloom within the mess and stillness that is life. I don’t even reread my other entries, I wonder if it’s just stupid LOL. But I love flipping through the pages. It’s really f****** fantastic. This journal (yes I know I’ve glazed it before) is awesome, makes me awesome, and I can tell it’s beautiful to others as well. It’s making me realize how much I’ve been missing and letting life pass by. Is this… the frontal lobe?
How could I neglect the beauty in those who love/care about me and that I love so much? I say this as I’ve found my phone is full of connections and notifications, which doesn’t give me worth, but I love that I’ve gotten better at reaching out to those I care about and maintaining what I have with them.
It’s difficult because I want to capture more and more of life, but it’s never enough. I want to take pictures and videos and dump my thoughts here and everywhere! I just browsed a bit through my camera roll and the content is quite immaculate. Must continue to keep record!! I’m so cool and only getting cooler and realer. I love being so ridiculously tuff!! Mwah mwah.
